Heart to Give

who has to heart to give and for whom is it hard to give.

Walk to Nowhere

Across the red iron bridges

on the volcanic river

With bare foot

I walked to Nowhere

 

With the cold cold

icy road – Blood on the toes

freeze  not flow

I walked to Nowhere

 

Tired and weary

With the dry eyes and

Thirst amidst the desert of struggle

I walked to Nowhere

 

Hopes gown Dreams dried

No more tears too

With one stubborn mission

I walked to Nowhere

 

Stuck my the harsh hands

Of death – The ghost  still

moves along the

Path to Nowhere

 

To find you

Just to find you

my kids paying their life for my luxury

Recently read an article from Linkedin titled How I made sure all 12 of my kids could pay for college themselves. I read this for the title, believing that it talks about helping kids with limited resources. Contrary to this, I was shocked to see the author boosting about how he kept his children in iron fist.

Wait I am not a promoter of a child pampering life style, should have a single child, never allow them to do any work and more importantly throw money as if it is nothing. No that is not my point. But this is completely weird. I didn’t see anything he has stated as a parents’ role.

I do not know anything about a 4yr old cleaning the toilet in his region of the world, though many of the commenter has opposed,  I do not have a word over it. But I have other concerns.  As a child i have done washing and other household works and never regrets for it.

My own daughter is 5+ now and she does loves helping me with little little children work like arranging thing back after family meal time or run around the house picking up whatever small thing I need for my work. Sometimes she would do the most the mess believing to help me but in real only doubles my work.

I will never force my child to learn new recipes and double or triple it, but I am really not against kids doing work at home that they can do. What bothers me here was the statement that children will get allowances based on how they did the chores.  They are not service person to get paid for their work. The work is just to tell kids that  they are also a responsible members of the family.

And I would pay for this only with kisses and hugs. I will pay the bill for the necessary requirement as a parent. Yes I will pay for the necessity. And she cannot clean the dinner table or the toilet sparkling clean and get money from me to spend for rubbish.

Food, the most tragic thing I could see here. The author either made them eat something they dislike or  prefer starving. Children can have their preference in their dinning table. It is not that they always choose unhealthy food. It is not mandatory to force them eat what they dislike most first. By finishing it they could hardly try tasting other things. Am not surprised that these children as adults try all kind of food. They have carved for taste and are now enjoying it.  

The Author claims that non of the children had food allergy. I doubt that is it they do not have or he does not know.  When I was a child I had a strong dislike for tomatoes. I was not a food picker, but still. Mom was so kind that she does not press on me. Tomatoes are most inevitable ingredient in Tamizhl cuisine, still she avoids. She would do a special fish curry for me adding little of lemon juice.

If someone complains of this behavior, she will defend me. “Janani will manage with any food and however it tastes. She doesn’t mind even if their is too much salt or blend. Poor child she cannot take tomatoes alone.” Thats true, Mom is an awesome cook, but sometimes it goes wrong. I would not complaint a bit and finish my plate. She cannot see me starve and I cannot see her work again. We love each other so much.

Back to my dislike towards  tomatoes, I was diagnosed with an allergy towards tomatoes in me late teens. People find it crazy to find a food allergy in a grown up girl. Moms love saved me.

The most important of all is the education system they had. “All the kids were required to take every Advanced Placement class there was.” Not all children are  Einsteins. That is not required too. A good Parent will accept your child’s limitation and appreciate their special talents,  guide them in the right path which will take them up in the ladder and enjoy good economical position as others so called Einsteins.

Success is not about getting a degree form top institution or in million dollar job. It is in the quality of life. Happiness at heart.  The most important of all is to bring the children together as an extended family and support each other, which the author has failed to do.  The description in the heading photo says.

The Thompson family photo. Or Photoshop, since they haven’t all been in the same place since 1998.

Wasn’t there been a single Christmas in the last 16 yrs  that the children wanted  to come together so that their will be at least one family photo. I end this post with Samantha Yakobchuk’s comment over the article as she has hit the nail on the head.

I guess running a household like the military worked for this family. But I wouldn’t want it. Below the picture, it says that everyone hasn’t been together since 1998. I’d much rather pay out of pocket costs for my children’s education and see them all together every so often!

Where’s the Winter

Last weekend my daughter was singing a song by herself. A song of her own. Here it goes.

tick tack tick tack
Round the clock
Baby dancing like a doll

pit pat pit pat water pot
Winter is so hot

Though amazed to see the poetess in her, I also felt sad to see her suffer in the hot burning weather even during a time, which is called as winter.

Poor child she always longs to see the real winter and the snowfall as in the cartoon series she watches. She wanted to had a day out of this burning oven. Out of the sweater that was brought from an icy region of north or north-east India, which mom made her wear for a mild chillness. Probably one day I will take her out.